Thursday, August 18, 2011

Surprise!

I decided to keep adding to this post and save it until I was ready to post it. Below, you will find my journey and my surprise, updated as I have had time.

July 30, 2011

Wow. I think I could just skip everything else I am about to type and just write, "Wow." I am still in a state of disbelief. The past few days, I have felt sick off and on. I thought I was getting a stomach bug since I kept getting sick and having to run off to the bathroom. Yesterday, we went to the mall for a bit to find some dress pants for Micah. I just felt completely drained.  I felt gross and sick and I again made several trips to the ladies room. We stopped to feed Adia a bottle and I said to Micah, "I have felt so bad. I felt kind of like this the last time I was pregnant, but I'm positive that I am not pregnant." He agreed that he thought there was no way I could be pregnant. I told him that I'd feel better if I took a test, just to rule that option out. On the way home, we stopped at Target and Micah bought some diapers, cereal, milk, and a 3 pack of pregnancy tests. I didn't rush to the restroom to take the test when I got home. I just waited until I needed to use the restroom again and decided to go ahead and take one, just in case. Within about 2 seconds, I saw the line appear. I read the test over and over and over again, just to make sure that I was seeing things clearly. Positive. I immediately began shaking. How could this be? The last time I got pregnant, we had to try very hard and take medication in order for me to ovulate. I counted days of my cycle, I went to the doctor, I had bloodwork done, etc. This time, we were pretty careful and we were not trying at all. I was even nursing when I actually conceived. How am I going to raise 2 babies at the same time? 2 babies in diapers... 2 babies in high chairs... 2 babies. All of these thoughts ran through my head in a matter of about 3 seconds. I walked out to the living room to tell Micah and show him the test. He was standing at the window, holding our sweet little Adia when I muttered the words, "Micah.... I am pregnant." He simply responded with, "Wow." He was stunned. I began crying. I couldn't help it. Last week, I was at the mall and I saw a young mom with a tiny tiny baby in the back of a stroller and a child less than 2 in the front. I remember thinking, "Wow... that mom has her hands full. I don't know what I'd do if that ever happened to me." Well, here we are!

I am so thankful for this baby and I love this little tiny thing that is growing inside of me, but the timing is not what I had planned for. And if you know me, you know that I am a planner. I don't like it when my plans get out of whack. I don't like feeling like I don't have control. Just in the past day, I have learned that God is in control. His timing is perfect timing and He is a much better planner than I could ever even hope to be. Am I scared? Yes. Am I nervous? Yes. Am I still shocked? Absolutely. Last night, we sat down and created a new budget for ourselves so that we can save as much money as possible before baby #2 comes along. After doing that, I feel a little less stressed about our situation. And even though this wasn't my plan, I know it has happened for a reason and that I am going to absolutely adore this baby. As of right now, I believe I'm due some time in March. I'm not sure of the exact date yet, due to the fact that I have no idea when or how I actually ovulated.

For some reason, I have been calling this baby "he" since I found out. I don't know why I keep referring to the little one as a boy, but I do. Micah was shocked to hear the news, but he quickly accepted it and became excited. He's hoping for a boy so that we can have one of each, but he also adores his little girl more than anything in the world, so if he had another little girl, I'm sure he'd still be in Heaven. One thing we really hope for right now is that people will be happy for us when we tell them the news. We didn't plan this at all, but we are excited to meet our baby. Instead of people saying, "What are they thinking?" We hope people will be just as excited for us this time around as they were for Adia. Right now, we are keeping our news on the hush side and just praying for this sweet little baby to grow into a very healthy, sweet, and lovely little baby boy or girl.
The day after I read the plus sign. In other words, this is me pre-bump.
The proof. :)
August 4, 2011
So, I'm up pretty early considering that school has not officially started back yet and my sweet girl is still sleeping. Over the past few days, I've had some time to process this reality. We've told very few people, and the few that we've told have been pretty excited for us, which was one kind of fear that I had and something that does give me a lot of comfort. I'm excited for this baby. With Adia, I was excited because I was trying to get pregnant for a while and I didn't know what to expect since she was our first child. With this baby, I'm excited because I do know what to expect. I know how wonderful pregnancy is, how fun it is to feel that baby move, to find out the gender, to hear that heartbeat, to see your baby's face for the first time, to nurse that baby, and so on. I know it will be hard because Adia will only be 15 months old and I'm sure she'll still be needing lots of attention, but I know that I love my babies and that God will help me through that. Ultimately, I look forward to holding my sweet little baby in my arms and covering that thing in kisses.
Part of me wants a girl and part of me wants a boy. It'd be great to have another girl because she'd be so close to Adia and I could see them growing up and being great friends. Plus, we already have a ton of girl stuff. On the other hand, we'd love to have 1 of each and I know Micah would love to have a boy. For some reason, I feel like this one is a boy, but I guess we will know in a couple of months. The doctor's office says I'm probably due around March 16, but that might change once I have my ultrasound next week. If that's the case, then I will be 8 weeks pregnant on Friday.
How am I feeling these days? Pretty nauseous. Last time, I was the most nauseous at night. I was usually pretty good in the mornings. This time, I get very nauseous in the mornings and it just kind of lingers all day. I've been getting sick to my stomach a lot as well. Almost anything I eat makes me sick. However, my appetetite has decreased some, but not like it did the last time. I feel a lot more nauseous this time around and just as tired as I was last time. Yesterday, I took a 2 hour nap and felt like I could sleep 3 more hours afterward. Some food really grosses me out. I usually love hummus, but I can't stand it these days. Micah was eating some the other day and he had to cover his plate with a kleenex so that I wouldn't see what was left over on his plate. I tried eating a bowl of Life cereal yesterday morning and I couldn't stop gagging, so I threw most of the bowl away in the sink. So far, I've craved baked potatoes. It's 7:09 AM, and I think I could eat one right now. :)
The news is sinking in and I'm getting excited. I'm ready for the first trimester to be over though so that I can start feeling better physically. The 2nd trimester is definitely the honeymoon period. I love love love that part of pregnancy. Until then, I am just praying that I can function well during this sickness and care for Adia to the best of my ability. As my doctor says though, "You're sick for a great reason." I do believe that. I will take the sickness and the discomfort for a precious and healthy baby.
August 7, 2011
God is so faithful. I am feeling a lot better just in the past couple of days. Right after I found out the news, I was feeling so sick. The last time I have just felt awful was on Friday. The past 2 days, I have felt really pretty good. I still have my moments, but they are not bad at all right now. I'm getting more and more excited for this baby and I can't wait to see the little jumping bean bouncing around in my belly on Wednesday. I have a feeling that this pregnancy is going to fly by. I know now to savor it. This time will go so quickly. I'm going to enjoy feeling every little movement and watching my belly grow. With Adia, I started noticing a difference in my belly (other than bloating) around 11 weeks. It got much more firm and looked a little swollen very low. Each week, it got a little bigger, and then when I got to about the middle of my 2nd trimester, I felt like it got bigger daily.
Josh and Katie came to visit us and Adia today for the first time since they heard about their baby's diagnosis. They hadn't seen Adia in person in about 5 months. We all had a great time. It made me excited to watch them with Adia. They are such great parents and I can't wait to see all of our kids together one day. It's going to be wild, but it's going to be sooo much fun!
Well, it's almost 11:00 and I have to be at work at 8:30 tomorrow. School starts on Thursday!! Way too soon! I'm not raedy! Needless to say, there's been a LOT on my mind. :) I'm going to go try to rest that crazy mind by going to bed, but not until I go and take a little look at my precious Adia. Goodnight!
August 12, 2011
On Wednesday, Micah, Adia, and my mother in law got to have our first look at baby #2. I got really nervous while I was in the waiting room. I was by myself with Adia as Micah and his mom were on their way. I had to fill out all of the paper work while trying to deal with a baby with an ear infection. She was fussy, pulling at the papers, trying to grab my pen, and she managed to pull a handfull of hair out of my head! I just thought, "If I'm having a hard time managing 1 baby, how am I going to do this with 2 babies?" However, even on Adia's fussiest ear infecetion cold no sleep day, I adore her. Knowing that makes me so anxious to love on this new baby to come. I can't wait to kiss that baby's cheeks. :) Anyways, on with the visit...
I went in thinking I was around 8 and 1/2 weeks pregnant. It turned out that I was just over 7 weeks. The baby was sooooo tiny that you could really hard tell what it was. Dr. Looff zoomed in and showed us what we were all anxious to see... the heart beat. I love watching that little heart flickering so strong. This baby is due on March 27, but if it's anything like Adia, it will be anxious to meet the world a little earlier.
So, here is our little little baby raspberry:
August 18, 2011

I am a little over 8 weeks and I am shockingly already starting to show. Some kids at school were curious and a few people have come to me asking me what is apparently the obvious... "Are you pregnant?" Therefore, I decided to let the cat out of the bag today. I can't believe how fast my belly is already changing this time around! I announced it to the kids today at school and most of them were pretty excited until I tod them that it meant I'd be gone for a while in March and April. I've had good and bad days with the sickness. I've found that when I'm at school and busy, I seem to feel a lot better. If I am just sitting around, the sickness starts to set in. Certain things do gross me out, such as hummus. Usually love the stuff... Can't stand the thought of it right now. I do crave anything cheesey. I have a bag of Cheetos beside me at the moment! Mac and cheese? Yes, please! Here's a picture of the bumparoo. I'm going to be large and in charge come March. :)
8 weeks :)

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